Bournemouth Classic

Your weekend, day by day

1. 1

   Day 1

   

   Quad biking & buggies

   From about 13:00 · 2 hours

   Arrival day. Drive down and check in, then quad biking inland: a practice session on the controls, then the trail behind a lead instructor. Old clothes, shoes you do not care about and a change for afterwards. Riders must be sober.

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   Quads and buggies run at countryside sites outside Bournemouth, with one main centre near Bere Regis about 22 miles from the town centre and no transfers included, so book minibuses. In an hour-long quad session each rider gets 20 to 25 minutes on the bikes while the group rotates. Do not arrive having had a drink: you will be turned away without a refund. Limits are 6ft 6in and 20 stone. Buggies do not run from November to March, and some combinations are Saturday-only. Expect to get muddy, and pair it with clays or rifles on site.

   You are taught the controls on a practice area, then you ride the trail in a line behind a lead instructor, with a sweeper at the back. Buggies are the two-seat version and are easier for anyone who does not fancy balancing.

   Sessions run from about an hour, and the course is mud, gradients and ruts rather than a track. It is slower than it looks and considerably dirtier.

   Old clothes, boots or trainers you do not care about. Helmets and overalls are provided. Sober, and most sites have a minimum age and a weight limit.

   

   Club entry, VIP & booths

   From about 23:00 · 3 hours

   The first night finishes with guest-list club entry, past the queue. The town-centre clubs are a short walk from the hotel. Dress codes are enforced on stag groups: no sportswear and no matching shirts.

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   Bournemouth's clubs are a short walk from each other in the town centre. The biggest, on Fir Vale Road, has two rooms, VIP booths and table service; guest-list entry on Fridays and Saturdays requires arrival before 11:30pm. A pop club on Old Christchurch Road offers reserved areas with a bottle of spirits, or prosecco and sharing cocktails, with guest-list entry before 11pm. Reserved tables with drinks packages on Yelverton Road take up to ten or 15 per table. Smart casual is the standard, and ID may be asked for.

   Standard entry gets the group past the queue on a guest list, which matters because large male groups are the first ones a door turns away. A booth adds a reserved table, a set number of bottles with mixers and a host who looks after the table.

   Booths are sold on a minimum spend rather than a flat fee at many clubs, so the bottles you order count towards it. Ask what the minimum is and what it includes before you agree to anything.

   Dress code is enforced hard on stag groups. No sportswear, no trainers at some doors, no matching shirts, and nobody visibly drunk gets in regardless of the booking.

2. 2

   Day 2

   

   Bubble football & human table football

   From about 12:00 · 1.5 hours

   Bubble football in the town centre: five-a-side inside inflatable zorbs, refereed in short matches with breaks. Sportswear and trainers, no studs, and empty pockets. It is tiring, so it works best before the evening starts.

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   In Bournemouth, bubble football is usually played at a leisure centre on Manor Farm Road in Kinson, so allow travel time from the centre. Sessions last an hour; arrive 15 minutes early. Wear trainers and a T-shirt; boots and bare chests are not allowed, and the limits are 6ft 5in and 22 stone. The final venue is confirmed about two weeks before. Giant human table football, where players are strapped to poles on an inflatable pitch, runs separately for 90 minutes to two hours, depending on group size.

   In bubble football you climb into an inflatable zorb that covers you from the knees up, then play five-a-side. Most of the game is flattening each other, and the ball is close to an afterthought. Referees run short matches with breaks, because it is hot inside the bubble.

   Human table football straps the teams to horizontal bars in an inflatable pitch, so you can only move sideways. It is less physical and better for a mixed-fitness group.

   Sportswear and trainers, no boots with studs. Empty your pockets and leave watches and glasses with the kit bag.

3. 3

   Day 3

   

   Guided bar crawl

   From about 20:30 · 4 hours

   The guided bar crawl: meet the guide at a fixed point and work through a run of bars, finishing with club entry, with the guide handling the doors. Eat first so the group makes the start time, and dress for the last venue: no trainers and no sportswear.

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   Bournemouth's crawls start in the town centre, often on Old Christchurch Road, from around 7pm, and run about four hours, finishing by 11pm or heading into a club soon after. Everything is within walking distance, though one Friday and Saturday format moves the group between bars on a party bus from 7:45pm, about 45 minutes per bar, reaching the club around 11:45pm. Bring photo ID, leave the fancy dress at home on the guided routes, and keep the pace steady, as doors refuse anyone who has had too much. Self-led routes arrive a week before.

   You meet the guide at a fixed point and move through a run of bars across the evening, usually four or five, finishing at a club. The guide knows the doors, so you skip the queue and the group is not turned away for being too large.

   Most crawls include a welcome drink or a shot at each stop, and entry to the final venue. The rest is on you. Groups from several bookings are often merged, which some stags like and some do not, so ask whether yours is private.

   Dress code is the club's, not the guide's. No trainers and no sportswear at the last venue, and matching shirts get refused at some doors.